Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy, the type of therapy I’m trained in, makes an odd claim.
“Give us 3 to 5 sessions and we’ll teach you how not to be miserable!”
That’s not the sort of Herculean promise that will get you on a late night TV infomercial is it?
Think about it. Is happiness 24/7 really a viable goal?
What percentage of the day are you happy now? Are you happy doing the garbage, picking up after the dog or driving in traffic?
But wouldn’t your life improve immensely if you learned to not make a big deal of it and torment yourself about the little things in life that merely sucked?
The next time you’re in traffic try telling yourself something that will keep you from getting miserable.
Instead of: “This traffic is awful, I can’t stand it and it shouldn’t be this way!”
Try: “I’d prefer that the traffic not be so bad but it’s like this everyday so I certainly can stand it, even if I don’t like it.”
A word game? Definitely. But words are how we think. Words we tell ourselves lead to emotions.
Put out the fire on the inflammatory things we tell ourselves.
Things AREN”T miserable.
Sometimes they just suck.