Have you ever had these thoughts:
I’d love to play the guitar but I’d probably suck at it.
I’d love to write poetry but that would be goofy.
I’d love to try to paint but what if I lost interest and it was a waste of time.
I’d like to take dance lessons but that people would think it was silly.
Self-defeating thoughts keep people from experiencing life fully. Most of the time people don’t do things because they fear the lack of approval of others. They worry what people would think of them. If people didn’t approval they consider that a reason to not do something.
People also fear not being expert at something. The self-defeating thought is: I’m not great at it, I shouldn’t do it.
Another reason people don’t do things is because they think they ought to have fun the very fisrt time they attempt something forgeting that fun comes when you’ve developed some skill. With more skill you can have more fun. Take the guitar. Your first day usually sucks. Once you learn a little the fun comes exponentially.
Next time you want to do something new and then dismiss the idea, challenge your thinking with these thoughts.
Do I really not do something because some people might think it is silly?
Do I really have to be great at something to do it? Can’t I just do it because I enjoy it?
Do I really want to not try something because it might take some work to develop the skill to enjoy it?3