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For some songs sucking isn’t enough.
Not only are they bad, they set off an OCD type reaction in your head getting in there and involuntarily repeating themselves forcing you to drink bourbon and sing “Don’t Be Cruel” as a palate cleanser.
Here’s some of the worst offenders.
We Didn’t Start the Fire, 1989, Billy Joel vs Spirit in the Sky, 1969, Norman Greenbaum
Some actually take these cuts seriously and will argue vehemently. Joel makes his second appearance here at BSD and deservedly so. A bunch of cheap rhymes about history is a bad idea for a rock ‘n roll song. Greenbaum’s simplistic statement on spirituality with its own nursery rhyme flow sucks bad too. Joel’s cut has me washing my hands repetitively a lot more and its speed and his tone is just more noxious.
Whip It, 1980, Devo vs. Hey Mickey,1982, Toni Basil
Please don’t tell me how important Devo was. Wearing sconces spray painted red and playing the same keyboard lick over and over does not a classic make. Twenty seconds in and I have to take a hot tub. Basil is more stupid than anything else but in a really annoying way. Mickey is a bigger assault on sanity.
Acky Breaky Heart, 1992, Billy Ray Cyrus vs. The Macarena, 1992, Los Del Rio
This one is tougher for me. Billy Ray’s got a little bit of an Elvis impersonator’s sound but that still doesn’t excuse saying the same thing over and over and over. Us English speaking folks don’t have a corner on shitty songs as Los Whatevers really annoyed the hell out of anyone who attended a wedding in the 90’s. I don’t know Spanish as well as English so it was hard to get this song stuck in my head. Cyrus loses.
Here are some other episodes of Bad Song Duels.
I’d say the two in the middle – Whip It and Hey Mickey tie for worst of this entire bunch. There are no words to describe just how awful they are.
Beth…It would be hard to argue with that…but which causes you more of an OCD reaction?
The dilemma….. Dare I chime in with my two Krona? The second I utter my OCD-triggering tune the rest of my day will be hell.
The hyperventilating is starting just anticipating the next 14 hours.
Swedish poodle-rockers ‘Europe’ have a song named ‘The Final Countdown.’
There, I uttered it.
If I don’t close, lock, open to check that it took, lock, open to check… every door I use today 47x I’ll be ‘off’ until Saturday.
The only cure I’ve found is to fight OCD with OCD by listening to the great Dr.Remulak caller on Howard Stern—its on YouTube and works every time.
I admire your courage brother…excellently horrid choice by the way.